Author, Paige Strickland, answers questions from the co-founders of Secret Sons and Daughters on how to self-publish an adoption memoir.
Secret Sons & Daughters: What prompted you to write a memoir about your adoption?
Paige: When my kids and I visited my mom’s house during the summer of 2002, they grew curious about my complex family history after they viewed some of our old slides. For the first time, my kids wanted to hear all the details of my youth, including the “bad” fashion tastes of the ‘70’s.
I’ve always enjoyed writing, but it wasn’t until that same summer when I enrolled my kids in a daily, three-hour summer course that I found the time to write more seriously. My project began as a document of family trees and stories for my kids, but over time, it grew into much more.
Secret Sons & Daughters: What part of your adoption experience did you choose to focus on most?
Paige: My story reflects how it felt to be raised as an adopted kid in the 1960’s through the 1980’s, a time when adoption was more shameful. I also cover my search experience and what it was like to finally find my biological family members in 1987 and 1988.
Secret Sons & Daughters: What was the easiest part of your writing process?
Paige: I was truly motivated to write, and as an adoptee, I have the firsthand knowledge and expertise to convey how it feels to be adopted.
Secret Sons & Daughters: What was the most difficult part?
Paige: Dealing with the daily distractions of life. When I started to write this book, my kids were in school. Although they were old enough to entertain themselves, I was also working at a time consuming job. It was hard to find the energy to teach to the best of my ability and give my children the attention they deserved.
Secret Sons & Daughters: Who encouraged and supported you the most during the writing process?
Paige: My husband, our kids, my sisters and friends all helped in various ways, including serving as first readers. I also hired a professional editor and joined a local writing group called Writing Workshop-Workshop, which is a spin-off of the Cincinnati Tri-State Writers Group. I highly recommend joining a writing group. They provide invaluable feedback.
Secret Sons & Daughters: Through the process of writing your memoir, did you discover something about yourself, or about the relationships you shared through the years with your families?
Paige: As I wrote my memoir, I began to realize just how dominant my adoptive dad really was. He had always been that way, but through the process of writing, I was able to see it much more clearly.
Writing got a lot of “garbage” out of my system. I wrote for me. However, I had to really soul search during the editing process. For example, writing about my father was tricky, but in the end I wanted my story to be honest, so he had to be in there. There were other things too that I had to decide if I should mention and consider what sort of impression I wanted to leave on my readers. That thinking ties very closely to the typical adoptee mentality of, ‘I don’t want to offend anyone, lest they reject me.’ I hope I struck a happy medium.
Secret Sons & Daughters: What authors inspired you?
Paige: I’ve been most inspired recently by other memoirists. Right before I began writing my book, I had read Angela’s Ashes by the late Frank McCourt. I loved his style of writing about the past in the present tense. I think he was brave to disclose so much about himself and his family. He was also a teacher, so I thought if this guy could do it, so could I!
I enjoy books by Jeanette Walls, The Glass Castle in particular. I like how she presented her father-daughter relationship. That meant a lot to me because I also have a similar theme. Jennifer Lauck’s books, Lost and Blackbird were great ones as well. I read a lot of other adoption-themed memoirs as I continued to write. Though I read these books and many others for my professional growth as a writer, they also entertained me.
Secret Sons & Daughters: How long did it take you to complete your memoir?
Paige: I began the project in the summer of 2002, and I wrote during every school vacation through June 2008. I edited until May of 2012, let my editor have her turn with it, and then I did a few more pass-throughs before going live. I released my memoir on the Kindle and iPad on September 15, 2013. The printed version was released one week later on September 23.
Secret Sons & Daughters: Why did you choose to self-publish your memoir?
Paige: For about 18 months, I queried over 100 agents through Querytracker.net. A few agents/agencies requested sample chapters, but beyond that, I had no further luck. I attempted this query during the downturn of our economy, and quite a few of my rejection messages stated that the agents could not afford to take on additional clients at the time. I am not famous, nor do I have special connections, so I figured my chances of being published with a traditional publishing house were pretty slim. When I had exhausted this route, I decided to take the independent one instead.
Secret Sons & Daughters: How do you self-publish a memoir—what are the steps?
Paige: I don’t know if there is more than one way, but I do know the answer to this is based on your goals. If your goal is to write a family history document alone, you can use a “vanity press” or small local publisher and have print copies made for your relatives. It typically costs between $100 and $1,000, depending on how many copies you order.
If you have enough of a story from which you can create a plot, conflict, and interesting characters to read more like literature, then you may be able to query traditional publishers, or try your hand at independent publishing.
If an agent or traditional publisher accepts your work, you sign over many of your decisions for the sake of getting published. The publisher and editors take over from there, often changing a title, selecting a cover image, and other potential changes. You may lose much of your creative control in the process.
I used 99 Designs to create my book cover. Nelly was my talented cover designer. Design costs run between $100-$600.
Next, I secured a Bowker—ISBN numbers for my iPad, Kindle and print editions of the book for $250. I also created accounts at Amazon Kindle, CreateSpace, and Apple.
Secret Sons & Daughters: Where can your memoir be purchased?
Paige: At this current time, it is available through the Apple iBooks store and on Amazon.com. Two local stores in my hometown of Cincinnati carry it as well: The Bookshelf in Madeira and The Booksellers on Fountain Square. I’m in the process of having printed editions available in retail stores like Barnes and Noble. For now, my memoir in print can be ordered online via BarnesandNoble.com, but not for Nooks.
Secret Sons & Daughters: Paige, thanks so much for taking the time to share what it was like to write and self-publish your memoir.